Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Scoob News

Good evening, I'm Anthony J. Scoobington, with WSCB TV.


Thieves broke into the Bode Museum in Berlin before dawn Monday and escaped with a 221lb gold coin worth millions. They apparently entered through a window, broke into a cabinet where the "Big Maple Leaf" coin was kept. The coin, is in the Guinness Book of Records for its purity of gold, would be worth almost $4.5 million at market prices because of its weight. Four testicles were found on the scene, so police are staking out area hospitals believing the thieves lost them whilst picking up the heavy object.


Michigan and the city of Flint have agreed to replace at least 18,000 lead or galvanized-steel home water lines by 2020 a sweeping deal to settle a lawsuit over lead-contaminated water in the city. A court filing Monday says the state will pay $87 million with state & federal money. The settlement is pending approval from a federal judge in Detroit today. A source who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us here at WSCB they heard a court official saying, "I know niggers bathe a lot, but they probably just want the clean water to make Kool Aid."


An avalanche killed 7 high school students & their instructor during field trip in Japan. The students were taking part in a mountain climbing lesson when the avalanche occurred, along with students from seven other schools. The region has received heavy snow over the past two days and avalanche warnings remain in effect. From our Asian affiliate WSUK, correspondent Jane Sukpipe, "People are trying to find out the true identity of the 7 students because they are believed to have not submitted permission slips, as well as getting on the bus thinking they were going to roast marshmallows teriyaki style & learn to ski with Samurai swords."


From the folks at WSCB have a great evening and stay hydrated.