1/5/09

1) HAPPY NEW YEARS old ho's, new ho's, males and females contemplating being a ho!! Yes, being a "ho" is for any sex. Lol. What comes to mind when I say "bigger balls"? How about "he's really stepped by grabbing some big balls" ? Lol. Granted I'm totally against saying "no homo" but, what if sportscasters said that shit? Lol. "When he takes it deep he really loves hitting his tight end. No homo." What would you do? Lol. Imagine John Madden saying that bullshit. "Then he took it deep. Boom! No homo.
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2) Oh shit. Speaking of "homo" do you remember the site I posted talking about "singles with STD's"? Yes I asked the question wondering if they bone raw. Lol Two people with herpes boning with a condom. Lol. Anyway has anyone seen the ad's for "gay/PR marketing"? They're online but they mention getting your gay focused product out to the gay community. I know they have gay chat lines and shit but, gay marketing assistance? Like what? Vaseline? KY? Q-tips? Speedo's? Just wondering. Lol.


3) My homegirl works at a bar/restaurant. She was at work yesterday working a Christian Singles mixer. I was trying to get her to put some alcohol in their drinks. Lol. But, I have noticed Christian singles websites and shit. So, my thing is, what do they do? Just wondering like they go out on a few dates. After that 3rd date, "So, do you want to come inside for a little while?" Dude is like "Well, I suppose I can for a little while." All the while he's thinking like * yes!! I'm going to get some snuzz!! That Christian site paid off!!* They get upstairs and shorty is like "Make yourself comfortable on the couch, I will be right back" He's on the couch checking to see if his deodorant is still fresh, remembering if he took his drawers out the hamper or got on a clean pair. Just ready for some possible action. She yells out from the other room "I am so happy you decided to come up. I was wondering if you were going to be ready. I had to wait for atleast the 3rd date to try this." He is trying to play it cool like, "it's ok I'm a patient man." Probably quoting the Bible real quick. She's like "Mmm that's real good to know. Especially for what I have in mind." She comes out the bedroom with a 5,000 piece jigsaw puzzle and shit. Lol.
Juuuuuust mad!!

4) Speaking of being "mad", you know how you get mad when the weatherman fucks up? Sitting out like "They didn't say shit about no damn rain!!" They can fuck up all the time. Like you get a random one to two day fuck up grace period on any other job right. Well I say that to say this, Abraham Lincoln was assassinated on April 15th, 1865. Do you know what day the Secret Service was founded? April 15th, 1865. Lol. Talk about a first day fuck up!! Naw, they didn't start protecting the presidents until 1901. Thirty-six years later and shit. They were sitting around talking about old shit at work and Abe came up. Someone like,"Daaaaamn they shot the president!! Someone should protect them with their life!" Supervisor was like "Oh ok, you start tonight son!!" Lol. The "suggestion box" was probably started that day too. Lol. Don't let everyone know you were the one that fucked it up for everyone else. Lol.



5)Oh man. When I said fucking it up for everyone else. That little lullaby song, "Rock a bye baby"? Da hell? What's reaaaaally good with that song? Why is the baby in the tree? "When the bow breaks the cradle will fall. Down comes baby, cradle and all."That's comforting? Booooy I tell ya. Lol. Just going to let it fall yo? How are you at the bottom like,"Man I would of caught little Bobby but, that cradle was coming down too. I might of got hit.
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