Monday, January 9, 2012

Scoob News

Good evening, I'm Anthony J. Scoobington, with WSCB TV.


Former president Pervez Musharraf said on Sunday he would return to Pakistan this month and prepare for elections, which could add to the country's turmoil. His first challenge may be to avoid arrest: On Saturday, prosecutors said they planned to detain the former army chief on charges he failed to provide security for ex-prime minister Benazir Bhutto before she was killed in 2008. He was overheard saying, "I bet if she blue balled them they way she blue balled me, then they would of let that d*ck tease die too!"

Russian police on Sunday said an 18-month-old child was swept into the sewage system when a sidewalk collapsed due to a ruptured pipe. The mother was pushing a stroller in the city of Bryansk when the ground caved in. The woman was rescued, but the child was swept away and presumed dead. The mother told reporters from our Russian sister station, VDKA, that it smelt like the baby's diapers so she wasn't jumping in. She was later seen at a club that night.


The Obama administration said Friday it is expanding the FBI's more-than-80-year-old definition of rape to count men as victims and drop the requirement that victims must have physically resisted. Lawmakers use such statistics in allocating money and resources. Pres. Obama was overheard saying, "Uh, if he got the wood, uh, then uh it doesn't exactly mean he wanted the goods."

From the folks at WSCB have a great evening. Stay hydrated.

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